Hi.
So long didnt post.
Shall blog out all my feelings of mine.
Yes you, 310511.
Why is it so hard to let you go? I don't know either.
You're the first one that making me suffer alot.
Before we stead i remembered, you didn't text me for a few days which idk why either. is i auto text you de. and yeah, we continued text. Till 31th's, 2am you asked me for stead. That's the happiest moment in the life. But sad to say, happy moments ended so quickly..
First broke up, i cried for 8 days. Those 8 days, i suffered a lot for you. Cried everyday. can't sleep every night etc. You'll never know how i feel anyway.
Okay, i think 2july or 3 july. You asked me for patched. You didnt know how happy am i. Aren't you? I finally got i wanted. Yes, i'm happy. The day before we 2nd broke i still went to your house. I'll never forget those memories. The first time we met is with Cm and your friend. watching kungfu panda. we were both very shy that time. hahahas. but after that we went out alone. watch x-men. And that's the first time we held hands and you gave a kiss. I was so shy but happy though. And the second time we met was watching ladadaland i guess. That was the first time watching horror movie w you. And that was the first time i lied on your shoulder. Feel so blessing. I still remember when walking towards the mrt you walk wrong and say want to test me only dhen push my head hahahs. <3. and on the train station you tell me got bangala is gay. haha wtf. and yeah, that time you sent me till cck. i'll never forget. Still remember the first time i went to your house. I was so shy. I keep playing with your hamster to avoid the awakardness. and the second time i went to your house. is the most memories that i'll never forget. I'll never forget you lied at my leg. and i'll never forget you hugged me to sleep and give me a kiss on my face and mouth. And still, i'll never forget that you bite my finger and I pull it away and tickle your hand and you tickle me. Those moments, were simply perfect to me. But sad to say, it ended to quickly. The next day, we broke. Yes. AGAIN. I was damn heartbroken. I bite myself and pinch myself. you'll never know how i felt. And on sunday, you asked me to meet you. hahahs, you bought wallet and the carrier damn funny and you made me laugh. But when on train, i cried. I turned away cos idw to let you know. and idk why. as usual, you still sent me to cck and we bid goodbye. that moment, i feel like hugging you and tell you how much i will miss you. but I controlled myself and let you go. b'cos i know, you're not mine anymore so i've no rights to. when you left, tears just roll down my face. Suddenly on last thursday, you ignored me. before that, you told cm to tell me that you liked another people alr. I totally broke down. I cried infront of my friend. Almost fainting. And i know you're avoiding. if not, you wouldn't still talk to me on sat. You ignored me for 3 days. those 3 days. Terrible i tell you. And on satuday 1 plus am, you talked to me at fb. you didnt know how happy am I. well. so ya. and just now we quarrelled. and i think you got pekcek so you ignored me. I cried at school. Don't you know how much you meant to me? I mean, i sleepless so many days and all i ever think is you. idk why either. Many of my friends told me to let you go. Sometimes, i physically said, i want to let you go. if you were mine, you'll be mine no matter what. But, physcially said want to let go. But my heart? It's really hard. Those flashback rlly hard. and i'm tired of holding you. Yes, letting go is hard. But, holding on is even harder. It hurts myself but not YOU. sigh... okay, felt much better after typing out everything. i don't care who will see whatever. If next life i get to know you, i'll choose not to stead w you. bcos before that, the moments are simply prefect..


yes you, zc, thanks for the memories? and thanks for the hurt you give me? Lol. haha. you're my best ex ever. Thanks. I can't let go of you. But i think i must? Cos you'll never be mine ANYMORE...